What couples are saying about The First Dance perspective

"I wish I had read this before my own wedding.  I already have 3 brides in mind that this would be good for and will give them your brochure.  What an honest, common sense look at the people-side of planning a wedding, stated so clearly.  Some of your example dialogues had me laughing out loud because they were so true!

Thank you again for this great tool."

Sincerely,

Amanda Niemotka
Amanda Events

Some reasons people took the class:

"I watched a fallout with my sisters wedding and do not want to repeat what happened.  We want to be respectful but find the middle ground."

"We can't get past figuring out a date. It's very stressful and complex so I'm hoping this helps."

"I am clueless about wedding planning so ANY advice I can get, any help at all, is wonderful."

"Learning about the people stress seemed intriguing."

What couples have learned:

"This starts as a framework to talk as a couple.  Things you never think about."

"We had a revelation.  We overcompensate for the other person and it just makes both of us enact our role more.  For example, I am a worry wart and will stress about everything, which causes my finance to tell me to relax, that everything will work out fine.  This just makes me feel he doesn't even get why things are stressful so it just ADDS more burden to me and I get even more stressed out."

"If we get lost in the planning, we won't be able to enjoy each other.   This stress exercise helps to name what's going on so we can move beyond the immediate situation."

"The starting point in all this is values!"

"If the other person can remind you of the BIG PICTURE, not brush off the exact situational stress, it will help.  All the stress and worry is about the BIG VALUE, not the little details."

"For me it's knowing how to be helpful to the other person, as a couple, in the big things and finding support in each other because ultimate it is just a day but we'll be together in a relationship forever."

"It was helpful to know about emotional limits and knowing that family won't change."

"Basically I have to sit back and look at what I'm doing.  I may be making it more difficult in how others are perceiving me.  I need to have an open mind about things.  [My fiancees] mom likes to make decisions.  I sometimes wonder if it's how I come across?  Is it something I'm doing?  She could be getting frustrated and I need to figure out how to make it easier for me and what I could do."

"The thing that crosses my mind is the fragility of the in-law relationship.  How [my fiance] knows his family for 30 years and I’m new.  It's a good reminder - there is a gap in how well we know each other."

"I'm relating most to the couple principles because we don't have a date set yet and haven't involved the families.  We're going to figure out the values - how we can come up with a product that reflects us."

from a groom who was dragged to class by his fiancee: "Knowing what’s a big deal ties in to wedding planning, figuring out from the list of values as a starting point." 

"The family principles were very useful.  I have a distorted view of family and watch her family to see what is a NORMAL family.  I don't know anything about weddings.  Something in this program has sparked my interesting - like the idea of mocking the other persons family.

"The emotional limits was good.  I've played the 'it's your day' part.  Is that the way it should be?  Am I don't the wrong thing?  It was an eye opener for me."

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